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There are many techniques that single
women can use to attract a man. Here is some advice that can
be very effective...
Check out
the author's hosted ebook and course:
How
to Attract a Man - How to be Irresistable.
When Do You Know If He's Right?
by Amy Waterman, Relationship Expert
How many dates does it take to make a decision
about whether or not you want to pursue a relationship?
I've always been curious about this aspect of dating, because
very few women have comparable experiences. With some dates,
the knowledge is immediate and instinctual. With other dates,
months may pass before the endearing nature of his laugh,
his smile, his character becomes apparent.
I know that I am a slow warmer. I am wary when I meet a man
for the first time. I am dubious of his intentions. I read
innuendo where none was intended. It takes me time to let
down my guard.
It's not because I'm naturally a suspicious person. It's because,
in the realm of relationships, I've been burned enough by
bad apples.
I'm representative of most women my age. By
one's thirties, one has experienced enough bad relationships
to associate the dualities of pain and pleasure with a man.
One is never sure how much to trust.
But this isn't natural.
Twenty years ago, I loved all boys. I played with them innocently
and full-heartedly. Boys were my playmates, my cohorts in
crime, and my teammates for games. I could think no evil of
boys. Their strange preferences for dirt, body odor, cars,
and constrictive underpants were simply idiosyncrasies of
fascinating playmates.
"As I grew older, I realized
that boys could no longer be trusted to play innocently with
me."
As I grew older, I realized that boys could
no longer be trusted to play innocently with me. My first
two male friends in college were
cool--a jazz musician and an Apple Mac gamer--until
I realized they "liked" me. I quickly dissolved the friendships.
I wanted the innocent companionship and friendship of my childhood
male schoolmates. I didn't realize that maturing would erase
that possibility completely.
When do we women lose our innocence with men? And can we ever
regain it?
In my line of work, one great danger is to take relationships
and attraction too seriously. Many women feel that the potential
of the man they are seeing is a matter of life or death. Instead
of having fun playing with him (like a child with a favorite
playmate), they evaluate his potential as a father. They situate
any future relationship squarely in the realm of adulthood.
The rest of their lives is at stake.
My flatmate tells me that the definition of compatibility
as a couple is when his or her issues are compatible with
your issues.
That's a pretty adult view of the situation.
I have a different view. I believe that you know a man is
compatible with you if he likes to play the same "games" you
like to play. Maybe you like to tease in a certain way; maybe
there's a certain game in bed that you like to play. Maybe
you like to go out; maybe you like to mountain bike. If he
likes to enjoy himself and have fun and laugh in the same
ways as you, you've found a potential soulmate.
We all knew back in childhood that there were some children
that we could play with for ages, and there were others who
liked games that didn't interest us. It's the same with men
and women.
"Yet in our
attempt to find a suitable man, we often forget to look for
one that we have fun with."
Yet in our attempt to find a suitable man, we often forget
to look for one that we have fun with. One that makes the
kinds of jokes we find funny (and laughs at our jokes). One
that is up for any crazy scheme we propose. One that will
make our life happy and light-hearted, not just important
and successful.
Life is serious and dry enough. We don't need relationships
to replicate those patterns.
Relationships should be a haven from life's dry seriousness.
You should be able to feel like a child with your partner,
unembarrassed at the silliest of games. Together, you will
be responsible for forming a life, raising children, making
a home ... but all this will only be enjoyable if you can
laugh together.
I have been out on dates with many successful, intense, highly
attractive men. I admire them, appreciate them, and learn
much from conversations with them. These are the men who will
shape the world. No woman can fail to respond to their power.
But as for myself ... in my little, humble world ... I envision
my ideal future as one in which there is always laughter,
in which I can return to childhood with my spouse and play
those games that I didn't get to play enough before I grew
"old." I want us to be able to chase one another around the
room, have pillow fights, and wrestle. I want us to tease
one another, share silly jokes, and dissolve the seriousness
of a working day with the magical spell of humor.
So, I suppose, the answer to my question is that it takes
exactly the number of dates you need to decide whether you've
found a companion you can play with. Some kids find a game
they can play with each other right off the bat. Other kids
end up trying lopsided games that one but not the other likes
until they either find a game they like in common or give
up.
Trust your child-heart's instinct. Ask yourself ... if you
were a kid, would you play with this guy? Or would he be one
of those kids who tries to control the game, or change the
rules, or cheat?
A partner who makes life more fun is a treasure indeed,
All the best in life and love,
Amy Waterman
Host of 2006 Edition of "How to Be Irresistible to Men"
Learn More at:
How
to Be Irresistible to Men
 You
can find out more about how to attract a single man of
your dreams and get the relationship you always wanted
at: How
to Be Irresistable to Men |
 Amy
Waterman is a professional writer specializing in attraction,
dating, and relationships. She has extensive experience in
helping women find love with her insightful and powerful secrets
into attracting love and making relationships work. She is
currently the host of the latest edition of "How To Be Irresistible
To Men," which is part of the 000Relationships Network.
Her innovative program is a powerful 2-hour
multimedia course with a comprehensive supporting workbook.
Additionally, members receive access to her "Surviving a Breakup"
audio series, original e-book, exclusive members-only forum
and personal email consultations. The "How To Be Irresistible
To Men" course offers all women – single or not - a
dynamic and comprehensive toolkit to attract love into their
lives and establish strong and supportive relationships.
Discover more about how to attract the
man of your dreams and get the relationship you always wanted
at: How
to Be Irresistable to Men
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