|
Should
You Relocate for Love?
by Eve Rasmussen
Go To the Photo Personals:
It's
Free!
|
The sun is shining for you, the birds are
singing, there's a spring in your step, and you've suddenly become one
of those people who hums. You're in love. Life is good except for one
small problem. Your sweetie is hundreds or perhaps thousands of miles
away. It's a geographic dilemma. And as exciting as the whirlwind weekends
of romance are, the two of you are beginning to think about how nice it
would be to share all of the little things that people in the same area
code take for granted, like spontaneity and casual time. Should you relocate
for love? Moving means a major upheaval of your life, but the long-distance
thing is expensive, frustrating, and ultimately limiting the depth of
your relationship. Here are some issues to ponder when you're considering
relocating:
What kind of life do you imagine for yourself in the new area?
You may have found Prince or Princess Charming, but how do you feel about
the kingdom? Is this some place that you can envision yourself living
out the rest of your days? How do you feel about the quality of life?
Take into account the weather, cost of living, access to cultural events,
proximity to wilderness, etc.
 How
do you plan to set up a support system in the new place?
Do you have job prospects there? What about friends or family? Moving
is emotionally stressful. You will be parting with people, places, and
things that are important to you. How comfortable are you with getting
to know new people? You and your companion will need to get used to being
together, and you will also be dealing with all the emotions of becoming
accustomed to a new place. Think about what you need to do to keep from
feeling isolated and lost.
Will your lifestyle change completely?
True love is the best thing in the world, but be sure that something appeals
to you about moving to your new area beyond one person. Rural life, for
example, may be perfect for your mate, but if you're an urbanite, how
long will it keep you happy? Are you excited about living there? Will
line dancing in Dallas do it for you when you're used to theatre in New
York, or vice versa? Think about how you'll adapt to the local culture
and how much of a lifestyle change you're willing to make. If you can't
think of a few ways to spend your time, think a little harder about whether
this is the right step right now. Also, if, god forbid, you and your partner
broke up, would the new area have any redeeming qualities for you?
How much time have you previously spent in your new area?
So, you thought northern Alaska was simply stunning when you visited your
love there for a week in the summer, but how are you going to feel about
the two hours of daylight in January? It is an issue. Find out as much
as you can about this possible new home so you can make an informed decision.
* Will you be accessible to old friends and family?
You must set up a new support system of friends in your new area, but
old friends and family can never be replaced. Think about how you'll manage
keeping in touch. Consider the financial burden if you'll be moving far
away from most of the people you know and love. This is especially important
if you're planning to start a family in this new place. Are you prepared
to get Mom's advice over the phone?
How are you going to say goodbye?
For many people, a home town is a big part of your identity. All of the
people and activities that make it special to you also make it hard to
leave. Relocating means closing a chapter of your life and starting a
new one, and your friends and colleagues may not be all that supportive
of your decision. How you will respond to adverse reactions? Make a list
for yourself of all the pros and cons about moving. It will help you in
explaining how you feel. Your best friends just want you to be happy.
How should you close up your life in the town you're leaving?
Moving is a major life change which gives you the freedom and the opportunity
to re-evaluate how your life is structured and what's important to you.
Take advantage of this contemplative time. If you decide that relocating
is what you want to do, tie up your loose ends in your old home. Do the
things that you always meant to do there and say all of the things that
you'd always planned on saying someday. Keep what you value, but get rid
of your dead weight and move on.
The magnetic pull between two people who are absolutely right for each
other can push many obstacles out of the way. Relocating is a big decision,
and it will inevitably be stressful, but sometimes you've just gotta listen
to your heart. Packing up your singlehood and your current way of life
is both scary and exciting, but if your partner is patient, understanding,
and willing to compromise, you'll have the best companion possible to
help you get through it. The two of you can unpack boxes, transfer bills,
explore the sights, and hum through it all together. And that's the best
very part.
Mix 'n Match Copyright (c) 1999 OneandOnly
Inc.
This is an article with all rights reserved.
Go
to the Photo Profiles:
Single
Women Friend Finder Photo Profiles
Single
Men Friend Finder Photo Profiles
Back
to Dating Advice
Home:
Single Dating .com
Site
Copyright ©
SingleDating.com
This relocate for love page
cannot be copied without full permission.
|
|
Should
you relocate for love?